3/28/2009

A New Crack on the Road: Deep Scratch

A few weeks ago I posted about certain words I thought were interesting for their variability and elusiveness. The words of my preoccupation were arbitrary and capriciously chosen.

The response was:
"Monsieur Robert, your list is very short and circumstantial; what about love, infinity, God, disease or cat?. On the other hand, if we try neologisms every day, we will get back to our own solitary and individual self and will not be able to communicate.... Communicating is really so important? Who knows"
Posted by: Lucho


Flattered to be called a Monsieur, I am compelled to post a not-so-shallow reply to my faithful viewer and newest follower.

Technically, the words that appear in Crack on the Road cannot be called neologisms. Certainly at some point or other these were "slang", although admittedly they do not contribute to the library of of whatever it means to be traditional or formal language. However, these words have a sound place to sleep midst the pages of our dictionaries and encyclopedias.

Sir Lucho is all over the place with several questions simultaneously raised. What about Love, Infinity, Disease, or Cat? Interestingly, the order of the list moves categorically from greatest abstraction of indefinable texture to what is presumably concrete. Defining Love cannot be as easy as explaining "cat", for example. At any rate, according to certain thinkers in the structuralist universe of philosophy (namely Saussure), words mean according to that which they are not in an endless strung web of signifying symbols and signified concepts. No word has essential meaning -- complicating what the word "cat" means/signifies.

But I am admittedly bored of conversing about what things are not, deconstructing meaning so that the only meaning left is that which makes available less meaning. Why not redeem some meaning and ruminate Love?

Below this one are a couple of posts related to love. Let these two philosophers do some talking for me. C.S. Lewis and Jacques Derrida.


“... we must be careful never to adopt prematurely a moral or evaluating attitude [about pleasures]. The human mind is generally far more eager to praise and dispraise than to describe and define. It wants to make every distinction a distinction of value; hence those fatal critics who can never point out the differing quality of two poets without putting them in an order of preference as if they were candidates for a prize. We must do nothing of the sort about the pleasures. The reality is too complicated.” -C.S. Lewis

Derrida: rumination on love



Over the abstract concept of love, Derrida meditates whether love is a matter of loving someone, or loving something in someone. 


"Do I love someone for the absolute singularity of who they are? -- I love you because you are you... or do I love your qualities, your beauty, your intelligence? -- The difference between the who and the what, at the heart of love, separates the heart. It is often said that love is the movement of the heart. Does my heart move because I love someone who is an absolute singularity, or because I love the way that someone is? Often love starts with some type of seduction. One is attracted because the other is like this or that. Inversely, love is disapointed and dies when one comes to realize the other person doesn't merit our love. The other person isn't like this or like that. So at the teath of love, it appears that one stops loving another not because of who they are, but because they are such and such. That is to say, at the history of love, the heart of love is divided between the who and the what." 



In other words, when love begins and ends, it is an issue of things that make someone up which birth or murder it. But when in the middle of being in love, how often don't we hear that love is a matter of loving "who you are." These two seem to work against each other -- or at least undo something about the way we think of love. If I love someone for "who they are", how do I know what that is? Can you serve me a bottle of "who you are", please? I'd like to take a whiff and measure whether I like it or not...

C.S. Lewis on love and "like": from Four Loves

C.S. Lewis

Lewis fractures what we call love into four different kinds. Affection, Friendship, Sexual, and Christian/selfless love (Storge, Philia, Eros, Agape). Four Loves is worth reading but is too long to quote in what I have wanted to be a non-heavy & not-(too)long blog.
Each love, as Lewis defines them, has characteristics he describes through referring to his own life and well of experiences. Storge is like the feeling one gets when looking at puppies. Friendship comes not in having acquaintence with people and socializing with them, rather through commitment more like that of lovers only without physical intimacy. Eros integrates storge and philia along with physical intimacy.  Only, eros is corrupted when it lacks a degree of selfless regard, agape.
 



This excerpt from Lewis' Four Loves actually has more to do with what we sometimes call love but is really more similar to "like".  

"Most of my generation were reproved as children for saying that we “loved” strawberries, and some people take a pride in the fact that English has the two verbs love and like while French has to get on with aimer for both. But French has a good many other languages on its side. Indeed it very often has actual English usage on its side too. Nearly all speakers, however pedantic or however pious, talk every day about “loving” a food, a game, or a pursuit. And in fact there is a continuity between our elementary likings for things and our loves for people. Since “the highest does not stand without the lowest” we had better begin at the bottom, with mere likings; and since to “like” anything means to take some sort of pleasure in it, we must begin with pleasure.”



 Notice where Lewis implies that for humans to love, there must begin with "like".   Admittedly he is currently referring to inanimate objects, but this norm of liking something before loving it transcends into like/love relations between persons (and he elaborates later in his book).  Does this claim agree or rub against Derrida's? 

3/27/2009

Humpty Dumpty

I changed the "about me" on my profile to this quote from C.S. Lewis' Four Loves. And it has a lot to do with my next post which I am currently hastily composing. After all, I have lazed about the disservice of not posting for over a week and a half!


"Of course language is not an infallible guide, but it contains, with all its defects, a good deal of stored insight and experience. If you begin by flouting it, it has a way of avenging itself later on. We had better not follow Humpty Dumpty in making words mean whatever we please."

3/10/2009

Wet Words: a taste of post-structuralism



The mind is a powerful part of being.  It is the interpreting lens by which the vessel of our existence understands phenomena.  How it reads events is determined by the indefinable self that is always molding words to life, making sense of the insensible.  Thinking and existence (however you define the term) involve participating in an ocean of discourse of which the surface of the water is never the same, never fixed.  Language is as variable as the waves, driven by the unpredictable surge of the sea and the push and shove of the whispered wind.  Language is the water on which we walk in understanding existence.  


Where is meaning and what is joy;  what do you think?


3/09/2009

Song of a Sailor

Aren't I driftwood washing where the waves carry me,
letting the wind pull me by my splinters leeway?
But if I ever ground eyes to land,
I should be surprised. Alone in the night,
there is no one with which to converse.
At least at sea, the moon tells me a story and I forget
my worries.

"Was I ever a lover? I watch enviously
as the lips of others kiss and give fruit their love.
For an hour before dawn and an hour at dusk,
As I fade, I watch my yawning Sun.
He does not abandon me and I do not surrender my longing.
His caress on my face is that makes me shine white light.
But was I ever a lover? ... before there was day or night."


Do I deserve the name sailor when my sails have torn
and no longer catch the breeze?
It was arrogant to sheet-in the fleety whisps,
trapping them, even if only for a moment, for a selfish purpose.
Who claims mastery or knowledge of nature must be a fool
and knows it when he is beaten.
O! at least the moon cares for my cause.

"A moon must entertain herself when
she cannot satisfy her desire. While the sun sleeps,
I study Love. Fom my flighty place, I see what is made
under the filmy mask of my domain.
My love will never so be expressed as is under the luster of satin.
Would it that I could! and in the warm arms of his rays, become
lost. Yes, Love is to be lost."




(unfinished) ...

3/06/2009

Mount and Rush More: overview of a sensitive conversation

"I went too fast and scared him away. Now he doesn't want me. To make matters worse, he says that he just wants to be my friend. We were friends before but now it just seems different. I like him now. He chased me and chased me... then when he finally gets what he wants he freaks out and says he won't have sex with me."
Simplification of the dilemma:

Boy likes girl for really long time and befriends girl.
Eventually, he makes clear his affections but is rejected by girl (repeatedly).
Finally, girl agrees to go out with what has by now become a close friend.

All is well.
Dating, dating, dating... kissy kissy...
All continues to go well and then some.

Things get heated and girl invites boy to her apartment *Quite the reversal of roles* (my favorite)

Tragedy! strikes. Why? Boy says he doesn't want to have sex with girl. He wants to take it slow. She agrees but desire perseveres and she (literally) mounts him, rushing the thing more.
Boy dumps girl.

---

Yesterday I had an hour-long discussion with a few of my girlfriends. Having built a reputation for being a good listener, a status apparently not many guys earn the privilege of owning, I am the go-to guy for advice on other men. Whatever the advice that I gave her, the only worthy thing I said that perseveres is "everything is going to be alright". Because it will...

My friend's strongest preoccupation was that she had done something wrong and that she had indeed been too strong in her address of affection toward the boy.

I am left stamped with a few open ended questions.

What is good advice; that which helps to get her back together with the boy or cautions her to avoid him?

What if he had slept with her, what does that add or take away from the dynamic of this situation?

3/05/2009

Curry Sauce and Yesman

Curry is defined on wikipedia as any of a variety of spicy dishes of creamy consistency. Usually, curry has a melieu of ingredients which give each curry whatever its distictive taste.

Life ought to be like curry. Thick with spicy walk and talk. Stirred in new, clever and fun activity to carry us to new delicious experience. Every day should be a new taste. A different kiss, a mischievous endeavor, a frightening leap of faith. Hold a friend's hand and run in circles in the grass. Climb trees at the park. Play a prank on a professor (who wouldn't be awfully offended). Graffiti your mama's neck with a heart and "I love you". Call your father and take him out for a drink. Swim in the ocean naked. Introduce yourself to a stranger (keep a friend with you for safety's sake).

Watch Yesman with Jim Carrey. If you're not a slim Jim fan, watch it for Zoe Deschanel's sake. She's a cutie. The movie presents a good example of what I mean when I say "life ought to be like curry".



Try it. It doesn't hurt to be daring and unsafe. Granted, don't live too dangerously, that kind of living is condusive to shorter lifespans. But as the saying goes: if you live afraid to die, you're already dead and'll never live.

"Live as if you'll die today" - James Dean

3/03/2009

A Crack on the Road

Aside from abused self-reflexive pronouns (which betray a natural human egocentrism) There are a bunch of words that I think are ridiculous and overused: "world", "life", "good", "society", "like". Additionally, the following phrases are overused: "economic crisis", "I'm not in the mood", "It's not you..."

Words with curiosity:

"gay" It once meant happiness and was claimed as a symbol of homosexual pride. Then it was faggotized/ turned into an insult. Today it means stupid. ... and gays still embrace the word gay.

"faggot" In England it is a pile of sticks or meatball (wtf). In America it means cigarette. Somehow it is an insult/pejorative term for gays.

"fuck" A greater contribution to American culture from England than the language itself, Fornication Under Consent of King is an interesting term which when acronymized serves as an all-purpose adjective/verb/adverb... and also as a pronoun!

"pussy" I love this word that can be replaced both with "cat" and "female genitals" at the same time that it serves as an insult which means "weak-one".


I don't feel like explaining necessarily why any of this is of interest. Maybe someday I'll write an article on the variability and escapability of language. After all, words are merely an inadequate toy we use to make known out thoughts. But would we have thoughts without language? hmm...

3/02/2009

Everything in Moderation





"All things in moderation! Too much of this or that is bad for you and will spoil. Don't drink too much. Don't sleep too much. Don't eat too much. Don't be angry too much. Don't be happy too much. It's wrong if you're too happy -- it means you're a maniac.

We grow up listening to the age old phrase and I think some of us internalize it in an unhealthy way. It is an unequivocal truth of being: Things, in general, must intrinsically have a "too much" line that when crossed makes the thing wrong. But what about moderation... If one's whole life was spent in moderation; isn't that an excess of moderation and therefore something to be avoided? It frightens me to think of what big ideas I could miss in life if I was more conservative about what is or is not a suitable adventure. Refer to my curry article.

Maybe there are some things to stay away from, though. Those are the things that will hinder your overall happiness in the long haul. Like gambling, heroin and parachute-less cliff diving.

I bet it's a cliché meditation of the youthful mind. Still, think about it.

3/01/2009

Chicken for the Soul: Parents and Sex

It occurred to me some time ago, and now I'll share it with the reader, that there is a peculiar way to grow up from one's parents: Imagine them as perverted sexual beings. Perverted is a relative term, of course, but the heart of the seemingly deviant mental expedition is the detail that if there is a measure of maturity it is the skill to acknowledge the vapid reality that mom and dad are at no more elevated a state of mind or body than we are. Therefore, they like to have sex. Oh! and if mom is currently single, she probably has a dildo somewhere in the house.

Whenever these slimy truths don't stress you out any more than imagining any other girl or boy in a steamy situation, then you can proclaim at least one color of transcendence -- you are a step closer to adulthood.

What I'm about:

So the idea is to have short concise excerpts of humanity published every once in awhile (at least I mean to do it regularly) that you can read and comment on. Most'll be written by me; maybe later I'll have some by others. That's my mission statement and the first post on the blog.

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