Mount and Rush More: overview of a sensitive conversation
"I went too fast and scared him away. Now he doesn't want me. To make matters worse, he says that he just wants to be my friend. We were friends before but now it just seems different. I like him now. He chased me and chased me... then when he finally gets what he wants he freaks out and says he won't have sex with me."Simplification of the dilemma:
Boy likes girl for really long time and befriends girl.
Eventually, he makes clear his affections but is rejected by girl (repeatedly).
Finally, girl agrees to go out with what has by now become a close friend.
All is well.
Dating, dating, dating... kissy kissy...
All continues to go well and then some.
Things get heated and girl invites boy to her apartment *Quite the reversal of roles* (my favorite)
Tragedy! strikes. Why? Boy says he doesn't want to have sex with girl. He wants to take it slow. She agrees but desire perseveres and she (literally) mounts him, rushing the thing more.
Boy dumps girl.
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Yesterday I had an hour-long discussion with a few of my girlfriends. Having built a reputation for being a good listener, a status apparently not many guys earn the privilege of owning, I am the go-to guy for advice on other men. Whatever the advice that I gave her, the only worthy thing I said that perseveres is "everything is going to be alright". Because it will...
My friend's strongest preoccupation was that she had done something wrong and that she had indeed been too strong in her address of affection toward the boy.
I am left stamped with a few open ended questions.
What is good advice; that which helps to get her back together with the boy or cautions her to avoid him?
What if he had slept with her, what does that add or take away from the dynamic of this situation?
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